Magical Tipsy Toes

Exhibit A – Beliefs

He believed that the one for him would come back to him.
He believed that when that happens, everything else will just fall into place.
He believed that no matter what, his heart will never just settle.
He believed that no matter what, he was the guy who’d be holding his hands twenty years later.
He believed that ‘the one’ existed.
And as we stood outside the balcony two years ago, he spoke of all the things he believed and of things that would eventually happen…

“Because I believe he will Kel….that no matter what his heart recognizes mine…that’s why”

Facts:-

“Along the way, I’d lost it….I’m just not sure which part”
“I’m not sure if I love him still….but I still care for him.”
“I don’t think my heart is in it anymore”
“I refuse to believe that he isn’t the one….he’s suppose to be. And he still is.”
“It shouldn’t be so hard, Kel…it really shouldn’t be this difficult”
“I don’t think there is such a thing as ‘the one’…maybe I was wrong, I don’t want to be. But guess I am.”

Exhibit B – Expectations

She didn’t think she would find anybody to love her.
She didn’t think she would find anybody that would be willing to look after her.
She didn’t think he would fall in love.
She didn’t expect to fall in love with him
She figured that it’ll last for a while and then it’ll disappear again.
She didn’t think she deserved

Facts:-

“Kel…what do you think of Indra Jane for our daughter?”
“At first I thought I was way in too deep, but I realize he is in over his head too”
“No, he’s not everything I want….but he’s here now. Sometimes you just got to settle and it’ll be ok I guess”
“His views are so different from mine….We’re different. How it ever work out?”
“But I guess that’s how we learn about each other….he drives, I give directions..we may no always agree but at least we’re in for the ride together.”

Exhibit C – Destructions

She didn’t feel the need to guard her heart.
When she loved, she gave all of herself.
She believed that soon enough, he will be ready to be what he can be.
She didn’t mind waiting because they saw the picture of the future they painted together.
She followed her heart when her head violently objected.
She turned around whenever he called back, hoping that maybe, just maybe it’s going to be different this time around.

“There is such a thing babe….you can’t think that way….I need to believe in it, my heart does”

Facts:-

“I’m tired babe….so tired of waiting.”
“I don’t want to listen to my heart anymore. It’s no point…why?”
“Fuck ‘the one’. I think ‘the one’ could be a dog actually. Not a cat or rat but maybe a dog.”
“I don’t know why. Why I keep crying….why my heart aches just thinking about it”
“I need to do this. I need to walk away from it all and never look back. Maybe then I’ll be free”
“My heart is done. I’m not going to feel anything for a long while now.”

Exhibit D – Autre Ne Vueil

Long time love.
Wherever he went, she went..
They knew from the beginning, they were meant to be.
In her heart she kept her promise and in his eyes he knew they were perfect together
They painted the future together…down by the beach forty years from now sitting on chairs, her hands in his.

Facts:-

“Yes. But I now believe you won’t know who ‘the one’ is.”
“I didn’t stop believing in it. I only changed my perception of it. You may fine ‘the one’ for that particular time in your life.”
“He was ‘the one’ for a long time of my life. As, I was ‘the one’ for him during that same time. I now believe that there are different ‘ones’ for everyone at different times of their lives. And the last person they spend with without another ‘one’ turning up is ‘the FINAL one’.”
“But I do wish it was always one constant one. I thought there was, but I was wrong”

Exhibit E – Stupid

She didn’t believe in this shit.
She saw the people around them who allowed themselves to feel
She noticed they weren’t worried or scared of showing how they feel.
She watched them giggle and smile whenever they spoke of the one they love.
She saw them holding hands and their eyes told their story.
She saw her after she accidentally bumped into him and she was grinning with her heart way up high.
She saw her looking at him, the way she began to look at her.
She saw them discuss their future together and how they’d bring up their kids.
She saw his eyes lit up whenever he walked towards him.

Facts:-

She never believed in all these forever things, but she does.
She never believed in showing feelings to anyone, but she does.
She never thought she was deserving of any kind of love, but she thought maybe, just maybe.
She never thought she could ever feel for anyone, but she does.
She thought it was best to hide it, but she doesn’t want to anymore.
She used to be terrified of these emotions, but she’s letting go now.
She used to hide it deep within her pockets, but she’s decided to give it to someone else now.

She lied.

I came to work today feeling really tired and sleepy. I had only a few hours of sleep. Not sure why I kep tossing and turning in bed. I wasn’t thinking much or anything….I just couldn’t head off to dreamland.

So trying to get any work done was really tough this morning. I tried everything. I had a cigarrette. I had cofee. I had plain tea. And nothing. I was still hell sleepy.

Then F&N Orange Crush came into the picture. And now I’m on a roll. I feel it in my bones. The hyperness has arrived. Just nice too cause I feel like calling Jones, just because.

*update

Ladybean seems to be doing fine. Although, she does have a tinge of orange on her now. Me thinks it cause of the F&N Orange Crush I was drinking just now. Mother Sharkbait has yet to see it though…I’m taking bets on how crazy angry she will be. I’m giving it a 10 on the scale of how crazy angry can Mother Sharkbait be. Anyone else in?

If only there was some magic, some way arounds these stars to make your wishes come true.