Magical Tipsy Toes

There are ways to go about trying to sleep when it’s sleeping time. But sometimes these things never go the way you expect them too.

Example A - Counting sheeps when you can’t sleep.

Ok, so I tried this method. They say it makes you get tired from the counting and your eyes get all droopy and then you head off to the land of sleep. So I tried this fluffy animal counting thing….but you see…when all my sheeps have jumped over the wooden fence…I’m wondering if the sheeps really do jump over the fence. And if they do, can i go watch it.

Clearly Example A is whack

Example B - Emptying out your mind

Now this is really interesting. Shoving out all thoughts from the mind, thus leaving one’s mind empty. Now, I’ll be honest…it is quite difficult for me. It’s really not that I enjoy these thinking sessions or I want it to be this way…But this is what I do. Now you need to picture exactly what I’m doing… I imagine a tiny me walking up in my brain/mind. Tiny me has a white blanket that covers the brain/mind. This would mean I’m covering all these thoughts, therefore making them vanish. Now tiny me that is inside the brain/mind is thinking she’s doing a pretty good job. So she lays down on this blanket. Now what happens is that when thoughts are vanished, tiny me inside brain/mind is chilling instead of sleeping and this leaves me to wonder why the fuck am I using a blanket.

Example B - is clearly too complicated.

Example C - Trying cough mixture or sleeping pills.

This whole pill trying thing was introduced to me by CFB. She gave me a couple of Valium(?) I’m not so sure. Now the unfortunate thing is when pill is taken, I’m suddenly hooked onto them and therefore resulting me in needing these things to sleep. Now that’s no good. I don’t want to be addicted or anything. But strangely, even when I’ve increase this dosage, sleep still does not come.

Example C - Help me

Example D - Try drinking a glass of warm milk.

A glass of warm milk makes tummy all warm and cosy, thus enabling you to sleep like a baby. For Sharkbait, what happens is I tend to need to go take a crap every fricking 10 minutes.

Example D - Milk=shit

Example E - Listen to soft music and it will lull you to sleep.

Ahh…this one is tricky. What happens when a song you know comes on and you start wanting to sing along. SLEEP DOES NOT COME! There is no lulling of such. It’s usually…”Whoaa..cool song. i gotta go download this”

Example E - Great way to increase your play list on the computer.

Example F - Read a book and your eyes will get tired.

It’s all lies. It does not help. I will finish the book and then I will think about the characters in the book and then I will remind myself that I need to discuss this with CFB or LMM. And then I want to read another book because since I’m not sleepy, I might as well.

Example F - Oprah’s book list ROCKS!

*Note: Please understand that I’m still wide awake. I’m running a little high on the tiredness. And I need to pee real badly. So this entry might sound I’m loco. But I think the reason as to why I am unable to sleep is because the weather is hot. Actually I don’t know. I was just saying for fun. I’m going to try again. And if sleep does not come, looks like my folks are going to be so happy with me for doing the chores at 6 in the fricking morning!! Ah well…it could be worse, it could be better.

I will not tag anyone. I will not tag anyone. I will not tag anyone. I will not tag anyone. I will not tag anyone. I will not tag anyone.

I will try not to tag anyone. I will try not to tag anyone. I will try not to tag anyone. I will try not to tag anyone. i will try not to tag anyone.

Orders must be followed. That’s why they are called orders. Therefore I shall be following them
And so I did…..

What is your earliest memory?
My mum bundling me up in a blanket and bringing me to my grandmother’s house because she was working the morning shift that started at 5.30am.

Nicest memory of your mother?
Rushing down from work immediately and carrying a bagful of plasters and gauze because she thought I had fallen down pretty badly in school during a game and there was a lot of blood. But there was no blood. My kneecap just got banged out of place.

Nicest memory of your father?
Watching him hold my mum’s hand during mass.

Nicest memory of your sister?
I was cycling at around my neighbourhood and rammed my bike into a car. She ran all the way home to get some plasters but she couldn’t find any so she took the bed sheet instead.

Saddest memory of your mother?
Getting hurt and crying because she’s accepted it.

Saddest memory of your father?
Phone conversation.

Saddest memory of your sister?
Calling me and asking me to get home quick because it had gotten bad.

Angriest memory of your mother?
When she made my knees worse

Angriest memory of your father?
Christmas 1998 – when he raised his hand

Angriest memory of your sister?
I was studying for my final paper and she looked at me and said “I wish you falied” in anger. I mean what if it came thru?!!

Most embarrassing memory?
Playing inter-class basketball and falling down right in front of this girl I liked

Small things that make you smile?
Silly messages. M&Ms. Watching you when you’re with him. Sasha snuggling up against Muffet

Proudest moments?
Graduating

Strengths?
Making people laugh.

Weaknesses?
Rash. Stubborn. Quick tempered. Pie. Dealing with my own emotions

Your idea of a perfect day?
Waking up without being shouted at. Having some pancakes/waffles (I’m not fussy) for breakfast. An afternoon swim and lazing by the pool with a book. And then a nice spiffy dinner with them.

Painful school/childhood memory?
There was this lady at my grandmother’s place. She was the ironing lady, well that’s we called her. She would use sweets to try and get me down from the stairs. And come on, I was young. Sweets rock. But before I could even get to her, she smiled evilly and threatened to burn me with the iron. I ran up the stairs, slipped and roll down the flight of stairs. Come to think of it…that lady was like the witch from Witches. Bloody bitch.

Age of first alcoholic drink?
I was 9. It was Christmas party. My uncle said beer was good. And it was.

Age when you were first drunk?
My 18th birthday at Zouk. I drank way too much and got so hammered. OGB & PP had to send me home. My dad woke up and I pretended I was real spiffy and sobered, or at least I tried. But he went back to bed and I went to shower and I realized that I was bathing with my clothes on. Debbie woke up to my laughter and she had to help me out. Didn’t help that she’s quite giggly too when it comes to these kind of situations.

Memory of mother/father drunk?
I have never seen them drunk. Although my dad was slightly tipsy on my 21st birthday that he was dancing in the kitchen with my mum.

It’s about 5 plus in the morning. And I can’t seem to fall asleep. I haven’t really been sleeping much for the past three weeks. It’s not that I don’t want too, believe me…I would give anything to just concuss and head off to dream land, but unfortunately I just can’t. My mind is going crazy. Maybe it’s because I lack sleep that’s why it’s going way too fast for my own good.

There are many things that going on in the head right about now.

A slight change, a certain step away. It’s a gut feeling. Maybe I’m wrong. I’m worried I’m right.

There are reasons why I do the things I do. Because I don’t want to regret never telling you or doing them…and I do it just so you’d see what I see.

A little game is being played. I like game but I’m beginning to get that the rules are quite difficult to follow. You will ask in time to come. You may think it’s because of pride. But it really isn’t. But I’m not who you want me to be. That’s why it should be left the way it is now.

The shoulder is killing the shit outta me. I can’t lift it and I can’t feel anything. Maybe I really need to go get it checked good and proper. Or maybe I can just snap it out of my body and then the pain will disappear. How about that?

It’s been emptied out for a while. I’m trying to patch it back. It gets difficult day by day. I don’t think about it much but when I do, it hits me. And wave after wave, I feel the need to burst. But I can’t. Some things must be kept under control.

Dear Sleep,

You’re a funny bastard aren’t you? I’m tired. Its night time and I’m still awake. Why? Why are you so selfish. Let me sleep, sleep. Please. I want to sleep like a kid and not think about anything but sleep. Come on…you know you want to take over. Quick ok, I’m going to try. I promise I’ll just let you lull me in.

Peace,
Sharkbait.